I don’t even know how many times I have uttered the words “Why can’t I lose weight” or “Why won’t my arse get any smaller”. But I now understand my grammar has been incorrect. What I should have actually been saying this whole time is “Why don’t I lose weight”.
And once I realised this, I had that old lightbulb moment. The sudden realisation that I have been making up excuses all these years.
Yes, this sounds obvious but for anyone struggling, as I am, let’s break this down.
The concepts of “can’t” and “won’t” suggest there is an impossibility. “It can’t be done” or “It won’t budge”. It suggests that something has been tried and tested and, perhaps, scientifically proven. And thinking this gives you a reason to not pursue the subject further. It’s already been confirmed it can’t be done so why bother?
But when you inject the “don’t” into the sentence, it becomes more positive and somewhat empowering.
Why don’t I lose weight?
And now instead of looking for excuses, I find myself looking for reasons I could possibly have to not lose weight. So why don’t I?
- It’s awful being out of breath after walking any distance.
- It’s awful having only a small handful of clothes that fit me now.
- It’s awful sweating after doing anything other than sitting down.
- It’s awful being “The Fat One” in my family.
- It’s awful looking back on family pictures and seeing how much I stand out for the wrong reasons.
… and so on and so forth.
And, of course, the weight loss is just my use of this tactic. It can, and should, be applied to everything:
Why can’t I train for that job? = Why don’t I train for that job?
Why can’t I be a professional photographer? = Why don't I sell my photos?
Why won’t this work? = Why don’t I make this work?
By making this little swap to your way of thinking, the seeds of Change are naturally sown. Each thought becomes a suggestion, a quiet Challenge.
So why don’t you try this yourself and see how far it gets you?
Until the next post, Big Love xx